For Trans Men Struggling With Their Identity

Trans Men Identity

For transgender men, it may be difficult at first to understand what exactly is happening. You are in the middle of an identity crisis and you don’t know where to turn to or what to do. Some days are okay but other days you’d rather be anything but alive. Don’t worry you are not alone. Many transgender people struggle with their identity at some point in their life. Luckily all hope is not lost.

Here are a few ways in which you can deal with your identity issues:

Recognizing there is an Issue

The first thing you need to do is recognize or acknowledge that you are going through an identity crisis. This is the first step in overcoming any problem in life and without acknowledgement, there can be no progress. The issue, in medical terms, is called “dysphoria”. This is where a person’s identity does not match how they are perceived by others. It sucks being called a woman or having to wear feminine clothes when deep down you know you are a man. This leads to mental agony, social withdrawal, and even physical pain. Once you have recognized that there is an issue, you can move on to the next step.

Seeking Assistance to Deal with this Struggle

No matter how strong you think you are, everyone needs help sometimes. Struggling with your identity should not be taken lightly as it has been known to drive some people off the edge.

The next step is therefore consulting:

A Trusted Friend

There is a saying that goes “a good friend is better than pocket money”. This is very true for instances where you may be doubting yourself and are feeling low. Reassurance is great when dealing with an identity crisis and a trusted friend will keep what you are going through private and may even offer you great advice.

The Trans Community

LGBT Community

The LGBTQ community, especially the trans community is very welcoming and encourages positivity and self-love for all its members no matter what colour, shape, size or orientation they may come in. There are many trans men and trans women who have gone through what you are going through in the past and can share their story about how they overcame their identity struggles. This may provide you with the motivation you need to overcome your own identity issue and other issues you may face as a trans man.

A Medical Professional

A medical professional should be sought in cases of extreme depression and hopelessness. These persons are trained in how to deal with such cases and can even prescribe a few non-medical treatments to help you discover your true self. You should, however, be careful as some of these persons believe that this is a “disease” and will try to “cure you” and cause further confusion.

Helping Others

After seeking help and eventually overcoming your own identity issues, your last step should be helping others. It is important to help spread the love and support you had so needed because you were not the first and will certainly not be the last to face such challenges.

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Beautiful Transgender Brides

For some of them to be the bride was only a dream. But they were persistent in their desire. And that day comes.

Felix and Helen Fenlon’s wedding: Britain’s first double sex swap wedding. Felix said: “This is the first day of the life I always wanted to lead – as the right sex with the right person by my side.

Maxwell and Janis were so inspired by Felix and Helen’s courageous decision to make their wedding public they asked the Fenlon’s to be their best man and bridesmaid at a renewal of vows. Janis, who used to be Ian – said: “Maxwell is my soulmate.”

Daliah Husu, who was born Luis Miguel Morris, and her husband Ruben Husu. Daliah was just four years old when she realized she was different from other boys – she loved dressing up as a lady. She said: “My aunt used to call me ‘little woman’. It was her way of saying: ‘It’s ok, there’s nothing wrong with it’.”

Russian Trans and cisgender woman marry legally. Trans woman Irina Shumilova, hasn’t been able to amend her legal documents so when she married Alyona Fursova they broke no laws.

They did however set the author of the ‘gay propaganda’ law head spinning. The couple has used this fact to officially register their relationship because under the Family Code of Russia marriage is “a voluntary consent of a man and a woman.”

Ignacio Estrada and Wendy Iriepa (Born as Alexis), tied the knot in a simple civil ceremony on the same day as Fidel Castro’s 85th birthday. They called wedding a ‘gift’ to the former leader. Then, they draped themselves in the rainbow flag of gay pride to ride through the streets of Havana.

Joanne Cassar, the transgender woman who fought an eight-year legal battle for her right to marry – paving the way for others – became Joanne Sciberras Edwards with her new husband Kurstin.

Jamie Eagle and Louis Davies: The 21-year-old bride, Jamie, was born a boy and the 26-year-old groom, Louis, was born a girl. And given the pits of despair, they have both endured (and still do) along with their transgender journey, it was a day they often wondered would ever happen.“We thought long and hard before agreeing to it, because life is difficult enough for us, without TV cameras encroaching into our daily lives and struggles,” admits Louis. “But in the end, that was our motive for going ahead. We want people to have a sense of what our lives are really like so that when they talk about transgender issues, they are more informed.”

Trans Icon Janet Mock’s Dreamy Hawaiian Wedding: Transgender icon Janet Mock and Aaron Tredwell married on the island of Oahu. “I struggled to imagine what my big day would look like because I’d never let myself believe I’d have one. I never imagined I’d be a bride. – she said.

To that, the photographer groom, who proposed to Mock after five years of dating, said, “I know she felt that way, and I say it’s ridiculous. I’m the lucky one in this relationship. I’ll be forever grateful that she chose me.”

Transgender model Carmen Carrera and husband Adrian Torres.

“Honestly, knowing that I was going home a married woman gave me a sense of peace… This wedding has given us a sense of freedom to be proud of what we have and who we are. Celebrating our love and what we call our ‘modern, modern family,’ lets us know that we belong here and that we also have a place to raise a family of our own on our terms. We feel truly blessed.”

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HRT — Hormone Replacement Therapy

Hormone Replacement Therapy:

All you need to know about Hormone Replacement Therapy. In our last videos, we covered how to start an MTF transition, and as we promised, in this video we will explain to you what is Hormone Therapy and what are the necessary requirements to undergo such a therapy.

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Top 10 Myths and Misconceptions About Trans People

TransSingle present a video of top 10 things about transgender people who often misunderstand.

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Life as a Transgender

Life as a Transgender

When one decides they prefer a different gender than the one they were assigned at birth, it can seem a bit obvious and thrilling, but there are some challenges that come with that decision. Before undergoing the complete transgender procedure there is a lot of teaching and preparation that is given to the individual so that they may be ready to face the decision and the consequences of their actions. These will include both physical and mental preparations, though most individuals who undergo this procedure will be 100% positive about their decision even before challenges come. The most important factor is after the procedure when most individuals are ready to face the world. They want to show how relieved and happy they are to be what they have longed to be for such a long time. To do this, they need a program that shows them how to get used to their new lifestyle.

New Identity

Transgender Identity

After the course of treatment, the transgender individual gets to take a new identity card with their new, preferred name. It will also include a photo with their new features. Whether male or female it will be good for people to know the individual and get used to their new identity; the earlier they learn the better for everyone. The new identity also helps boost their confidence when they meet people as they get to introduce themselves without any fear or shyness.

Social and Voluntary Activities

Life as a Transgender

After the treatment, it is beneficial for the transgender person to get to socialize with individuals of their new gender by going out and experiencing different activities with different people. The transgender community has a great network and groups where individuals get to talk about their experiences, how they overcome discrimination from society, and how their friends and co-workers have come to accept them. Joining these groups is a must for transgender individuals as it helps them adapt faster and boost their confidence around people. Doing some community volunteer work also helps them to make people appreciate that they are not psycho, but are just normal humans who have made a certain choice about their life. This is also useful for getting full or part-time employment in the future, as it improves the understanding that nothing but the gender has changed; being transgender does not affect the working ability of an individual.

Eating Healthy

Apart from everything else, after the transgender procedure, individuals are required to eat well and live a healthy, fit lifestyle. They should try to eat food that will help boost the immune system and the reproductive system, as well as the urinary system so as to avoid complications in future such as infections and so on. Exercise is also recommended so as to strengthen the muscles due to the alterations and reconstruction that the body would have undergone. Finally, drinking plenty of water is very important.

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Making a Transgender Long Distance Relationship Work

Transgender Relationship

Long distances and relationships have always proved to be a difficulty for many couples. As a matter of fact, the distance between two involved people can either make or break that relationship. When your significant other is miles away from you, at times the world can appear more dismal than it is. The difficulty associated with a distance relationship is also true when you are dating a transgender partner. However, there are tips that can help you maintain your transgender relationship despite the distance between you and your partner. These tips include:

Talk to your partner before you leave

It is very critical to sit down with your partner and talk before either one of your travels. In such a talk, both partners are an opportunity to air their worries and concerns about the new state of affairs in the transgender long distances and relationships. The bottom line is to make sure that the two of you are on the same page about the long-distance relationship before anyone travels. Leaving abruptly might freak out your partner, consequently causing damage to the relationship.

Despite the distance, set aside time for each other

Transgender Long Distance Relationship

Though this might sound obvious, you might be shocked to know that communication is widely abused in transgender long distances and relationships. Communication is the glue that holds a relationship together. Therefore the more a couple communicates openly, the better the relationship will be. Purposely setting aside time to talk with one another is a good habit for cultivating healthy communication in a transgender long distance and relationship. Try communicating daily with your transgender partner, even if it is just for ten minutes.

Use technology to grow your relationship

As mentioned earlier, communication plays a pivotal role in the wellbeing of a relationship. Consequently, to ensure that the communication is effective, you should use technology. The latest trends in communication technology have far surpassed the days of pens, paper, and snail mail. With a superb webcam, you can even have a date on Skype with your loved one, regardless of the distance between the two of you.  Constantly seeing your partner’s face can kindle memories that will make the long wait worthwhile. Do not let the mentality of “out of sight, out of mind” cause your partner to forget about you!

Plan on when the distance will end

Transgender Long Distance Relationship

This is one of the most essential parts of a transgender long distance and relationship. How long the two of you will be apart should be discussed before either partner travels, and, if applicable, any changes to those plans should be reported as soon as possible. Having a clear picture of when the two of you will together again erase any doubts in a transgender long distance and relationship. The two of you should make a habit of constantly reminding each other the remaining days before you will be in each other’s arms again.

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Dos and Don’ts When Dating a Transgender Woman

Dating a Transgender Woman

If you have finally decided to take the plunge and date a transgender woman, then there are some things you need to learn so as to make your relationship worthwhile. First of all, dating a transgender woman is no walk in the park. Your friends and family might not be accepting of such a move. However, the popular adage “love conquers all” holds water because if you can make a relationship successful, others will eventually come around or you will learn how to deal with those who don’t understand. Below are some of the Do’s and Don’ts of dating a transgender woman

Dos

Be at peace with your decision

Deciding whether you really want to date a Transgender woman should top your priority list in the Dos of dating a transgender woman. This is vital because the journey of dating a transgender woman can be bumpy. You have to accept that dating a transgender woman does not make you gay.

transvestite-dating

Take good care of yourself

Dating a transgender woman is akin to dating a not transgender one. The need to look good cannot be understated. Always dress modestly and hit the gym if needed for you to be more attractive to your transgender lady.

Stand up for her

As mentioned earlier, society has many prejudices, and there is much discrimination against transgender woman. Men who date them have also received the same treatment at times. You might even be told that you are not a ‘real’ man because you are dating a ‘fake’ woman. However, you should develop a tough skin and always defend your transgender woman against any form of discrimination.

Treat your transgender woman with respect

As society continues to bask in the bliss of ignorance – and consequently make the lives of transgender women hell – you should endeavor to love your woman with all your heart. Just because she is a transgender woman, does not make her any less of a human. Transgender women are worthy of love and respect.

Compliment her

Transgender women always strive to look their best. You can complement her efforts by simply complimenting her looks. Also, compliment her body, but make sure it’s moderate so that you don’t come across as an amorous pervert.

Don’ts

Don’t be too curious

transvestite-dating

Just like how curiosity is hazardous for cats, the same can apply to you if you are Dating a transgender woman. Do not assume that just because you are in a relationship with her that it gives you the authority to question her about her past. Be gentle with her. She will tell you all you need to know when she feels safe enough to do so.

Don’t be amorous

Transgenders have been known to have voluptuous bodies that make men drool like fools. However, if you are dating a transgender, no matter how hot she is, you should never seem to be hell-bent on having sex with her. Transgender women have been through a lot and are therefore very cautious before inviting you to their bedrooms. Your patience might be put to the test, but if it triumphs, great sex awaits you!

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